Thursday, May 1, 2014

Day 20: Feeling Angry



March 20, 2014

Excessive drinking fixes nothing. Nothing. The shit you're trying to numb will still be there when you sober up. If you sober up. Tragic things happen to people when they're really intoxicated, and no one thinks of that as the outcome of the evening when they're pounding back drinks. Do something about it. Talk to someone. If you're in Korea, talk to me. I've been sober for 13 years now. If you're elsewhere, call someone. And for fuck's sake- if someone you know is suffering and spiraling out of control, don't enable their drinking. It's true that someone won't stop or get help until they're ready. I have no doubt. But we must always ask ourselves what's the best way to support those around us? What's the best way to support our own grief? For some, alcohol is something to be enjoyed. It's part of a good time. For others, myself included, there's nothing in the world so terrible that a drink can't/won't make worse.

March 20, 2014

A sweet blessing from Gareth's family to include me in his obituary. I've been gifted some wonderful people.

March 20, 2014

Looking forward to warmer weather. Looking forward to cherry blossoms in bloom. Looking forward to a drive along Korea's winding country roads with the window down, arm out and fingers grabbing at the wind, sunlight making it hard to take it all in, this song playing in my car, and a feeling of happiness in my heart. It's coming. It has to be coming.
"It's like I'm falling out of bed/From a long, weary dream/The sweetest flowers and fruits hang from the trees/Falling off the giant bird that’s been carrying me/It's like I'm falling out of bed from a long and weary dream"

 

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