He said (then), She says (now)
A poem for 2 voices
Is this really happening?
Is this really happening?
Are you really here with me?
Are you really not here with me?
I feel so lucky to be seen with you.
I want to see you.
Sometimes I can't believe you're really with me.
Each morning I wake up and can't believe you're really gone.
I bought this for you because I knew you'd like it!
So many things I see remind me of you.
I made it back to Gyeongju. I already miss you.
Sometimes I'm crushed by the weight of missing you.
I'm coming this weekend! I'll see you in 4 sleeps!
I've seen you twice in my dreams.
You've got this, babe! You're a spiritual warrior!
You were wrong about me. I'm no warrior.
I wrote another poem for you. Let's meet at the coffee shop.
Remember how I'd touch your words on the page?
I love how feminine you are while still being a bad-ass.
I sat next to a man today with hands like yours.
I love the sound of your voice.
I can't bear the sound of a steady beeping anymore.
You really get me.
You really got me.
I tried to be better for you.
I'm trying to get through this. I really am.
I love your style. You have the best style.
I wore your brown leather bracelet today.
I'm sorry I'm late, babe.
I mailed a gift off to your nephew today.
I love to watch your joy grow.
I feel joy still. It's just a slightly deadened version of before.
I will see you this KISS-MAS EVE! See what I did there?
I can't think about next Christmas.
You are the you of my words.
I was the you of your words.
You're so good with people.
I wish you could have met Maud.
Oh, you're cold, babe! Wear my hat. Here. Put this scarf on.
I sat on your scarf on the foggy beach yesterday.
I'm keeping my eye out for a perfume for you. I know you like citrus.
Nothing I have of yours smells like you anymore.
I wore these shoes for you. I know you like them.
This weekend I wore the skirt you gave me.
Let's cuddle. Come here. Let's cuddle.
Falling asleep takes a long time. I always hold something.
Would you like a cup of tea? Tea is medicinal!
Earl Grey. Darjeeling. English Breakfast. I can't look at the boxes.
I love collaborating with you.
Grief is a solo process. No one can do this for me.
Let's go to the tea house. I'll bring some Billy Collins to read.
I'm reading another Mary Roach book.
I hate how disorganized I am.
I'm having a hard time remembering things.
I got a part! I nailed that audition!
I don't think I can do this.
Guess what? Just got the survey results. They don't hate me after all!
I don't think I can do this.
I can't believe we ran the whole course! I did it! You're a great coach, babe.
I don' think I can do this.
It's not just me, is it? There's something amazing happening here. With us.
Strike that. I can do it. I am doing it. I just don't want to.
The way you describe the grief process-Finally, finally I am able to understand what I was/am walking through-How true, how true-"Strike that, I just don't want to" There were many times I felt like this barren tree in the middle of winter-the wind gusting and yet I was still standing-just to be standing.........Bridget, walk that walk one foot in front of the other-keep on keeping on-I kept looking for an explanation from God as to why this traumatic event happened-I do not have answers yet-but I believe we will be granted an explanation as to why all the suffering-I believe that we go through large things for a reason-it is not all for naught-I just know that I know that I know God will bring you-God will bring me to the other side and life will become beautiful again-You are so loved Bridget-lean into that love-allow it to strengthen and preserve you-allow it to heal your emptiness-
ReplyDeleteYour words are my words. My thoughts tag onto your words.
ReplyDelete"I want to see you."
"very morning I wake up and can't believe you're gone."
"So many things I see remind me of you."
"Sometimes I'm crushed by the weight of missing you."
"I've seen you...in my dreams." (I search for answers, for comfort, for signs you are OK in my dreams.)
"I wish you could have met____________ ." ( I wish you could have spoke to _______________________. Maybe speaking to _______________ could have given you hope and direction. )
"Falling asleep takes a long time." (Waking up with the harsh reality of your loss smacks me in the face and weakened my broken heart.)
"Grief is a solo process. No one can do this for me." (Love helps. Time doesn't.)
"I'm having a hard time remembering things."
I'm trying to get through this. I really am.
"I can't do this."
"I can do this, I just don't want to."